Lights and Lizards

SO I got pulled over tonight. I was coming down the highway on my way home and about 5 minutes from home, I saw the lights flip on behind me. Looking down, I realize I am going 17 miles an hour over the speed limit (as is the rest of the traffic I was driving with just moments earlier).SHIT! I can honestly say that I haven't had a ticket in about 15 years so I immediately began to panic and wonder how much a ticket like this would cost me. I gather all my info together as the nice, young sheriff approaches my car. He politely asks me if I know why he is pulling me over. Well my mama didn't raise a fool, so I reply...no, all the time thinking...well yes officer, because I was speeding! But to my surprise, he says nothing about that, but informs me that he is pulling me over because I ran a red light. WHAT?!? He asks for my info and then asks, "Are you visiting Florida?" "No, I moved here last week". He then asks me where I live and I tell him that I am just up the road a bit.He looks at my address on my ID and says, "Richfield? I went to school with a guy from Salina. (Of course you did!) THey're pretty close together aren't they?" I literally have never gone anywhere tht I didn't run into someone who either knew Richfield themselves or knew someone from there! "Yes, they are about 18 miles apart." I reply and smile. I then see my chance to get myself out of this and say, "the stoplights here are crazy, they are sideways and run right to left, I'm used to the hanging down ones and I don't see these ones". Ok, maybe not the best way to end that comment, but he smiled and said, "Yes, they take some getting used to". He then hands me back my stuff and tells me to drive safe and watch for the lights, he would hate for me to be in an accident. Not a bad way to end what was a stressful day. The stoplights are not the only thing I am getting used to. For the love of all that is holy... THere are also the lizards. During the day here, there are virtually no bugs, no flies, no pesky things at all, except for the 3" cockroach I saw the other day on my patio..EWWW. But that all changes as the sun starts to go down! Lizards...of all shapes, sizes, and colors appear from everywhere. THere are little gray ones and bigger brown ones with a red thing that puffs out at their throat. There are little green gecko looking ones and a myriad of other types also. THey scoot and scatter across the sidewalks, they run up the railings on the stairs. They jump into nearby bushes and then back out again. I stood on the sidewalk for about 30 secs and had several run right across my feet. Ok, so I should be grateful that there aren't snakes or spiders. Trust me, I am. And for anyone wondering, there aren't gators either, at least not where I live. But there are lizards, lots and lots of lizards. I went out on the patio tonight to sit and drink my coffee and to enjoy the 75% humidity and the wonderful temp. of 84'(that's sarcasm folks). I'm minding my own business when I feel something on my hand. I look down and there is a tiny, like an inch long, lizard on my hand. Before I can even react, she (I could see eyelashes) runs up my arm and perchs on my shoulder. She seemed quite unaffected by the small squeak that came out of my mouth, and just sat there, blinking at me. I didn't really want to swat her away because I didn't want to hurt her, so we just sat there looking at each other for a few seconds. She might have taken this for permission to advance because she moved closer to my throat, at which point I nicely asked her to get off of me. She ran right down my arm and off my hand...right onto my lap. Not exactly what I meant little one. I lifted my arm thinking that the movement would scare her away, but it didn't. She continued to sit on my knee and provide me with some company for about 5 minutes until I moved my feet to stand up and then she was gone. I named her Lily. We'll see if she comes back tomorrow. I may have a new friend!

First Week in Florida

So before I begin, I feel the need to issue a disclaimer or a warning. I may swear, so if you're offended by cussing you probably want to stop reading now. I have now been in Florida for four days. Funny, in some ways it feels like I've been here much longer. in most ways however, every moment is some new experience or some reminder how out of my comfort zone I truly am and the ever present question in my head of WTF am I doing out here? Especially considering that within hours of arriving here, we were alerted to the impending hurricanes Laura and Marco. (They both shifted paths and missed here completely-But what a WELCOME TO FLORIDA!) So just a few things I'm learning rather quickly… For anyone who really knows me, they know that I am directionally challenged. Back in Utah, I could picture myself standing on the front porch of my parents house and I could determine north south east and west. Let me tell you, that doesn't work so well here. I've had a couple people suggest that I put myself in the direction of where The ocean is and then I will know which way I am headed. Yeah that would be a great idea if it weren't for the fact that I actually live on somewhat of an island and have ocean on both sides. Makes for a beautiful view but makes it pretty damn hard to know what direction I'm headed.I was driving home from work tonight and the only reason I knew I was headed in the right direction was because my car said I was headed west, and I knew that was the direction of my apartment. My ex-husband Jason, could find his way to and from anywhere and could also give people directions to anywhere based on the location of a maverick gas station.I thought about trying that because you can't throw a rock here without hitting a waffle house, a tattoo place, or a liquor store or a Winn-Dixie grocery store(isn't there a country western song that says something about Winn-Dixie)? The only problem with that idea is that not only are they everywhere but the road system here it's not as well marked as back home and you don't know that you're onto a turn or street until you're passing it. So I'm finding myself eating a lot of waffles while drinking a bottle of tequila and getting a new tattoo. If you've never been to a Waffle House, you are missing out! I don't eat waffles right now but I can get a double burger for $2.00 and it is actually pretty edible. The waitress and I are getting to be pretty good friends. Oh and another thing about driving out here, speed limits signs are just decorations. People don't even consider them "suggestions", they just ignore them completely. The traffic travels at easily 20 miles above the limit in most places. I drive on a 4 lane highway and on I-10 to get to work and it is a 45 mph limit most of the way. If I am not doing 65 mph, I am getting run over. I'm ok with that, I hate driving slow, but you can tell I'm from somewhere else because I actually slow down when I see a sheriff. And everyone calls me Maam'.I realize it is just polite manners to them but Holy shit it makes me feels old.I had a conversation with a young man at the Winn-Dixie tonight and he called me Maam' and I told him it was ok not to call me that. We literally had one of those movie conversations where he apologized for calling me Maam' and then finished up the apology with...you guessed it...Maam'. I don't think this is something I will have any luck getting away from. I guess there are worse things I could be called. Today was my first day in one of my stores. Alot of things came back to me from when I worked for the company before so that is good and helps to not feel completely overwhelmed.I am hoping that as I start to get into the schedule and pattern of the new job, that the transition to being here, alone, and so far from home and the people I love, that I will begin to feel more grounded.In the meantime, I will keep taking walks, taking pictures, and be happy when I can actually get where I'm going with less than 2 wrong turns.